You can find the original post here along with other articles  about the author’s journey.

If you’re interested in writing a guest blog post about postnatal depression, or having your existing post featured, please get in touch via the Sling Sally Facebook page.

Meeting the SS proto Hackney Herringbone for the first time

A while ago I wrote a short article, a diary if you will, for A’s Babywearing Story aboutpostnatal depression and grief. The loss of someone close can be a major trigger for a condition that can be fatal. I am lucky; I had attentive and extended care of perceptive midwives, a brilliant health visitor and an alert GP. I say lucky because I realise how rare that safety net exists for many who grapple with PND.

I was musing about babywearing in general, how much it occupies my mind. It’s less about buying, more about the act of wearing, the relationship with my baby but also about the camaraderie, the conversations with fellow wearers, the reading of posts on the brand groups, holidaying of wraps and sometimes the trading.

Looking back it became an arc of involvement, starting roughly around summer last year as I searched for an identity that, if temporarily, could replace one bound up in a researcher level of interest in fashion, fabric and designers. High end babywearing is a very good fit for a personality who quests for fine detail about wrap production, blends, wrapping qualities and representative photography. The thoroughness I approach this comes from the slightly obsessive tendencies of my father; useful qualities when you are also a researcher.

Then I considered the days as they go, early mornings with the girls busying for the day, carrying Smallest to our childminder whilst holding my eldest’s hand, immersing my day with work, browsing the groups on my phone as I commute back for the walk home with the girls. The bedtime routines, dinner, a catch up with some councillor work or work-work…and then the yawning gap towards bedtime.

I realised I fill it with the activities that revolve around babywearing for I know that if I keep my mind busy, if I leave no space for anything else to come through to the forefront of my mind, I can avoid the thought that my father is no longer here. Life carries on cruelly without him.

I examine the timing of the arc, the early summer onwards and can trace it back to the darkness of the previous autumn/winter lifting to a sun strewn grey. I can see my mind beginning to emerge from the isolating blankness that PND manifests as, and having the first flashes of a life without my father.

I scrabbled for something else, something to grasp and hold onto, to focus my mind upon.

I sit here weighing up whether that constitutes a running away from the yawning gap my father has left behind; the gap I skirt around with my hand shielding my vision. I’m not looking, not looking, not looking. Perhaps it is a hurling of myself into a quest for beauty and nourishment; interactions that part fill the hole; and that is a positive. Perhaps it is both.

What I am learning is that I still avoid the interactions that mean any confrontation or acknowledgement of this loss. I am working on that.

In the meantime I shall stay immersed in the relative safety, and the joys, of babywearing.

Original guest blog for Wrappped

Hi, I’m Sally, 30 year old Mum to 15 month old Reuben, and this post is to share my experience of how babywearing has helped me to cope with postnatal depression.

A short background is that I started suffering with antenatal depression at about 6 weeks of pregnancy, which had become severe by the time I was diagnosed and started treatment at 20 weeks. So firstly I’d like to raise awareness of antenatal depression as well, as it’s talked about even less than postnatal depression and, having had both, is just as horrible and isolating to have to deal with.

We have a lot of pets and a large garden to look after, and a massive trigger for my depression is feeling like I can’t do anything or that I’m behind on what needs to be done. Because of this, I decided while still pregnant that I needed some kind of carrier as I needed to be able to carry Reu around with me while I was doing things. Little did I know at this stage how important to my life babywearing would become.

By the time Reu was born I’d worked really hard in therapy, combined with medication, and my mood was pretty good and I felt able to cope. But sleep deprivation, ill health, poorly babies, and other things all take their toll and over the last year I have continued to struggle with postnatal depression at varying times. And this is where babywearing has saved me.

In the early days it meant I could have Reu with me always and form an incredibly strong bond with him. In the days of non stop feeds it meant I could have a break and move easily while he slept in between.

It enabled me to get outside in the garden, the fresh air and the sunshine. I could let the chickens out in the morning, or feed the frogs, or say hello to the ferrets, play with the dogs, all while Reu was happily snuggled against my body. Basically, to continue living my life while still caring for Reu. And all these things helped to keep me sane. The ease of walking out the house to go for a walk or get the shopping, and you don’t have to set up a buggy or negotiate tight aisles or crowded places without running over peoples ankles. At points, I have struggled with anxiety and having Reu on me in a sling makes me feel safe, we are one unit in these times (as we were before he was born), and we are a team. As a team, we can do anything, and go anywhere that we need or want to go. And if my anxiety kicks in, it’s easy for me to get us to somewhere that feels safer, without a lot of baggage to carry.

As I’ve become more involved in the babywearing community, it’s meant I’ve made friends and found new opportunities to find enjoyment and fulfillment in my life, with Reu. We volunteer at local sling meets, and go for walks and lunch with a local babywearing group. Sometimes these things help me get out the house when I’m struggling, and once I’m there my mood starts to improve.

So for me, and my ongoing journey through parenthood and postnatal depression, babywearing has just been vital in allowing me to continue to be me while I adjust to the whole new world of Motherhood. To enable me to get to know my incredible son, who is the most outgoing, wonderful and adventurous toddler I know. And I’m sure babywearing has helped him to be as awesome as he is. He has always been a part of every aspect of life, he’s gone places, been at eye level seeing everything that’s going on, had uncountable people chatting to him, and just experienced everything possible, while Mummy chatters away to him, and feels safe herself.

My husband pointed out to me when I set up my Facebook page that I’m smiling in all the pictures of me carrying Reu, so I suppose the summary is for me, babywearing means happiness.

www.facebook.com/slingsally

Original guest blog for Bracknell sling meet

    Hi all, I’m Sally, Mum to 13 month old Reuben and a wide variety of pets! I live on the outskirts of Wokingham and I hope you enjoy this blog.

How did you get into babywearing and did you plan to wear your baby when you were pregnant?

We bought a babasling when I was pregnant (and hubby practiced with a teddy!). I knew I wanted to be able to carry him as we have a lot of animals and a large garden to tend to and I thought carrying would make that much easier (and it does). At that point I viewed wraps as too complicated and wanted something I could quickly pop him in and out of. The Baba did that for us and I loved it and we didn’t even consider upgrading until I wanted to start back carrying when Reu was about 7 months old.

Reu was about 4 weeks old here.

In the Baba for the whole day at Newbury show, about 8 months old.

Tell us about your wraps and carriers?

So I started with the Babasling. When he was about 7 months we saw some friends using a Connecta to back carry and thought that could be useful as he was starting to grab at things that sometimes he shouldn’t be grabbing. We looked online and ordered a Palm and Pond mei tai as they seemed very reasonable. We got on fine with that and used it for whole days out, as we had with the Baba, but then I went to the local sling meet! My intention was to try a Connecta to check I liked it before we bought one but they were all out on loan so I ended up trying a wrap conversion mei tai (WCMT) by the amazing Little River Mei Tai, and I fell in love. It is so comfortable and spreads the weight so well I don’t feel like I’m carrying at all, plus Reu fell asleep in it instantly. So my very early Christmas present was a custom WCMT from Little River made from Shire Slings Love Geek and it is still the comfiest carrier I’ve tried.

When I was looking at wraps to choose what to have the mei tai made from I discovered the wonderful world of wraps and the variety of wraps and carries and started getting curious. It was November when our first woven arrived (not including the love geeks that I sent off to be chopped!), and it was a size seven Nati lutea sky. It was pre loved and so soft and floppy and the addiction began there! I got a lenny lamb ring sling around the same time as an upgrade for the baba to live in the car for quick carries.

So my stash (and I am way too sentimental to sell anything I’ve carried Reu in!), now includes – Teal babasling, palm and pond mei tai, WCMT by Little River mei tai made from Shire Slings love geek in apple and petrol, lenny lamb betula RS, Natibaby bubbles RS, Natibaby dinos RS, Kokadi nils in wunderland RS by Geeky Sweetheart (so very comfy), Natibaby Lutea sky 7, Girasol light rainbow diamond weave 7, Firespiral driftwood cyano seafoam 7, Little Frog jade 6, Kokadi elephant parade 5, Natibaby dinofun 5, Joy and Joe luceo non uro 5, Natibaby kangaroos 5, Natibaby wrapped messages 4, Lenny lamb betula 2 and Jumpsac solace bosphorus 4 on it’s way!

First time with a woven.

What’s your favourite wrap/carrier you’ve ever owned and why?

I loved the Babasling for enabling me to get into babywearing. My favourite carrier has to be my Little River mei tai love geek WCMT for being the most comfortable and beautiful thing ever. The meaning behind the wrap is perfect for carrying your baby in and made me cry when I first read it. My favourite woven is definitely firespiral driftwood cyano seafoam. It’s so beautiful and light but feels really supportive, it feels such a different weave to others I’ve used and it’s so comfortable.

This is the first time I wore the love geek out, I’ve got neater since, I was just so excited!

If money were no object, what wrap or sling would you own?

All of the firespirals! I would definitely love to try more FiSpi. Also, our wedding theme was peacock feathers so I love the look of the Artipoppe Argus wraps, but these are definitely out of my price range currently!

What do you like about babywearing?

I love being able to be close to Reu all the time and interact with him so much. When we go for walks he can see everything I can see so we can look at everything together. He’s very sociable which I’m sure is in part because he’s had so much interaction with people by being at their eye level. I also love being able to get on with things that need doing, while having a happy Reu with me, for instance he’s asleep on my back as I write this. I have suffered from anti-natal and postnatal depression and babywearing has definitely helped me cope with this as it’s enabled me to get out easily, get jobs done, and form an incredible bond with Reu.

What do or did you find hardest about babywearing?

The only thing I can think of is sometimes peoples opinions of you. Most of the time people are very positive and say how snug and happy he looks but sometimes it can feel like the non carrying mums don’t talk to you as much because you’re the ‘hippy with the bit of fabric!’ But then the friends you do make are the ones who accept you as you are and I’ve met some really lovely people through the babywearing community.

Does your partner join in with the babywearing?

Very much so! He used the babasling before I did, and also uses the mei tai and ring slings. He was initially not interested in wrapping but was inspired by Sling Dad Dom and now wraps himself. I got the dino wrap to encourage him and he has since seen wraps and asked if we can get them. My Mum’s even had a go too.

Ben (hubby) wrapping with dinos.

What kind of comments do you receive when you babywear out and about?

Mostly very positive. Lots of comments about how comfy and happy he looks and I love talking to people about slings and encouraging them to get to a sling library and give it a try if they are interested. I’m finding more and more mums are showing an interest which is great. The funniest question I’ve had is a friend once turned to me and said ‘do you even own a buggy?!’ (The answer is yes, I haven’t used it for well over six months and used it very little before then, but due to storage it lives in my boot and I drive it everywhere with me!)